Dum Pendebat Filius

My friend and blog comrade Jack, of The People’s Republic of Seabrook, has come out in favor of an Al Gore presidential bid, more or less:

My hope is that Gore will decide to run again, if for no other reason than he deserves better than to be remembered as the man from whom the Presidency was stolen. Al Gore deserves to have the opportunity that was stolen from him in 2000. The question, of course, is whether or not he still wants it…and who could blame him if he doesn’t?

WE DESERVE BETTER. We deserve to have a man with the integrity, intelligence, and vision of Al Gore in the White House.

Hmm…I promised myself that I wasn’t going to endorse a Democrat this early. I think I just broke that promise, eh?

I agree wholeheartedly that “[w]e deserve to have a man with the integrity, intelligence, and vision of Al Gore in the White House.” I also personally think Al Gore would be a better President than any of the Democrats who are currently in the race. However, I think an Al Gore 2008 presidential bid is the worst thing that could possibly happen.

I’ve written about this before (see 2007/03/02, 2007/02/27, 2007/02/10, etc.), but I think it bears repeating.

There is no way on God’s green earth that Al Gore could get elected. Yes, his public reputation has been coming back in a big way lately. He has turned out to be 100% correct about the Iraq war, and his documentary film “An Inconvenient Truth” won an Oscar and is influencing public policy discussions across the globe.

But the Washington press corps is still addicted to trivia, and they still have the same visceral disdain for Al Gore that they displayed throughout Campaign 2000. The bullshit stories invented and spun by the Liberal Left-Wing Mass Media about Al Gore are fucking legion, readers; they are goddamn myriad.

Three-button suits. Polo shirts. Cowboy boots. Earth tones. Could Al Gore wear any item of clothing without cable-TV talkers discussing how fake and phony it was?

Invented the Internet. Inspired “Love Story.” Discovered Love Canal. All these stories were total bullshit, purposely misreported, and the Liberal Left-Wing Mass Media kept pretending they were indicators of Al Gore’s troubling “character problems.”

And now Gore has published another book. The Liberal Left-Wing Mass Media’s response? ZOMG AL GORE IS A FAT FATTY!

Readers, what will happen if Al Gore runs for President in 2008? What if he won the primaries and became the Democratic candidate for President?

We’ll be subjected to another year and a half of “news reports” about Al Gore’s troubling character issues, his search for “who he really is,” and his wardrobe. Oh, and now we’ll also keep hearing about how fucking fat he is.

He will lose, and the Republican will win. And readers, we’re living in an America where the Republican presidential candidates are openly competing with each other to prove who will be the “toughest” when it comes to indefinite detention and torture of “terror suspects,” who will be the “strongest” when it comes to promulgating and continuing a series of bullshit ham-handed imperial wars, who will be the most belligerent in pursuing a foreign policy of schoolyard-bully truculence and unilateral arrogance, and who will be the most “conservative” in trashing the Constitution of the United States in the name of “national security.”

We cannot afford another Republican administration. The “conservative movement” is sick and corrupt to its very soul. These people are deeply un-American, no matter how many fucking crocodile tears roll down their faces as they invoke those who were murdered on 9/11, no matter how many flags they wrap themselves in while they commit their crimes and atrocities. We cannot afford another four years of this, readers.

Al Gore cannot win. It’s sad and it’s unfair, because he’s the best person for the job right now. But there is nothing more important right now than taking control of our executive branch out of the hands of the GOP and the deeply un-American authoritarian “conservative movement.” Thus, it’s best if we (libs and Dems) forget about Al Gore and concentrate on finding a good, electable candidate for 2008.