Dum Pendebat Filius

A sniff in the kortevar, that what you cry for, yeled? A prert up the cull, a prang on the dumpendebat?

Poissons d’avril

The “miracle Allah fish” phenomenon has hit the news just a couple days before the 1st of April; the fish could have literally, not just figuratively, been poissons d’avril.

I saw it on Michelle Malkin’s site, where she, predictably, managed to make a complete fucking ass out of herself:

So, finding Allah’s name on sea life is miraculous, but coincidental resemblances on ice cream cones are blasphemous?

Here’s a hint, wingnut: A person, or several persons, designed that ice-cream-cone package. A food wrapper is a man-made object. Food wrappers don’t create themselves out of thin air, nor are they living creatures. Is a fish a man-made object? Hmmm. “Sea life.” Hmmmmm.

Now, whether the food wrapper was “blasphemous” is another story. But God, or Mother Nature, or Random Selection, or the Intelligent Designer, made those fish. Human beings did not. Is that a difficult concept to grasp?

Anyway. The fish in the pictures on Malkin’s site aren’t the “real” “Allah fish.” My friend The Liberal Avenger, never one to be caught asleep at the switch, quickly sent me a link to the official Allah Fish website, where there are pictures of the “real” fish. If you can read Arabic, click on the link and go have a look. Hell, go have a look anyways. It’s fun.

My opinion?

The BK ice-cream cones said “Allah.” No question about it. But these fish? It’s a real stretch.

I can’t really see “Allah” in the first fish. Down by its tail, there’s what looks like a final letter haa’, the last letter in allah, and there are some vertical lines that could be alifs or laams, but it’s a real stretch. If you didn’t know it was supposed to say “allah,” you’d never see it.

The second fish does have a pattern that superficially looks like miim and Haa’, the first two letters in muHammad, but that’s all I see. I’m forced to conclude that no amount of stretching can induce me to see “Muhammad” in this fish’s scales. I’d like to, but I can’t.

Conclusion? These fish are a phenomenon just like that grilled-cheese sandwich everyone was talking about a few months ago. You can see what you want to in these random patterns. To see anything here requires a real stretch of the imagination.

Update: I realize I wasn’t clear about the Allah Fish website: The website is in English. Only the patterns on the sea creatures’ scales are in “Arabic.”

Filed under: Language by dumpendebat at 2006/03/28 - 17:53


  1. The Liberal Avenger:

    Shit - I hope it’s not too late for me to cancel the order I placed this morning for a dozen clown fish.

    I wonder if one can eat them?

  2. The Liberal Avenger:

    P.S. Manshake!

  3. The Liberal Avenger » Blog Archive » The Allah Fish: An Analysis:

    [...] The Allah Fish [...]

  4. The Liberal Avenger:

    Test… Manshake…. Test…

  5. Malkin(s)watch :: Malkin then and now :: March :: 2006:

    [...] Update: Oh, for the - the pictures on Malkin’s site aren’t even the right fish. New Journalism, ladies and gentlemen. [...]

  6. Sadiq:

    Yeah, that’s weak. I couldn’t figure out where the alif and hamza were supposed to be. I will agree with you on the haa, though.

  7. fechner j├╝rgen:

    click http://www.wonder-fish.com

  8. yonaton:

    ..______ ALLAH CARTE ______..
    (over 1.2 billion now being served)

    Yeah, what a twit that Malkin is.

    Just like the BBC…

    …and the Guardian…

    …oh, yeah, and Akkah-Da-Fish’s “o-fish-ial” website…

    How stupid she was to fall for THAT!

    (oh, and that “wonder-fish” site you list and the one above aren’t the only ones that claim to have such miracles. Try, also…


    But, if I understood you correctly, we may agree that this sort of thing indicates that those folks have way too little of importance to occupy themselves with.

  9. dumpendebat:

    Your comment, yonaton, got caught by my spamfilter because of all the URLs. I just happened to notice it and retrieve it.

    You did not understand the point about Michelle Malkin, which was not that she “fell for” anything, but that she tried to use it as an example of Muslim inconsistency.

    She figured that if the name of Allah appearing on a Burger King ice-cream wrapper was considered blasphemous, then so should the name of Allah in a fish’s scales.

    Of course, this is ridiculous, because an ice-cream wrapper is something created by human beings, and the pattern of a fish’s scales is not.

  10. samir ouahab:

    allahu akbar dieu est grand et dieu est puissant ya pas meilleure createur que allah

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